As my boyfriend has decided to take care of dinner/lunch/food today I thought I'd write another entry. I'm usually the one who cooks but during the weekends I let him take over. And honestly, we don't work well in the kitchen together. He finds me way too controlling and well, I probably am. I just want things to be done right! Haha. Everyone is barbecueing today but we don't have anywhere we can use a grill. Well, we could walk down to the lake, they have a public barbecue-area there but there are lots of families down there and honestly, I don't like screaming children and fat sweaty men in wife-beaters. So we'll fry our meat instead, we bought barbecue-meat. So yeah, it will be almost like a barbecue.
After my appointment with the psychiatrist, my boyfriend and I went to a mall close to where we live so I could buy the things I need for my DIY-project. I want to pimp up a jacket with patches and studs. By the time we got to the DIY-store I had already spent most of my money though. I had to pick up my meds (I got a really suspicious look and lots of interrogating questions from the pharmacist. That's what happens if you want to pick up three different benzos), I went to H&M and bought some lipstick, went to another store to buy some concealer and primer and I went to a huge store with small cute things for the home (It's called "Lagerhaus"). They had fake moustaches!! I just had to buy them. Haha. Anyway, so I could only get some basic things at the DIY-store. I had wanted to buy some pens and stamps for my letters too.
Do you want to know how weird my mind works? I'm of course now analyzing if my behaviour, buying all these things, has anything to do with that I might be bipolar. gah! I was just so relieved and happy after the appointment at the psych-center that I happily bought some small things. I didn't buy anything expensive. The most expensive thing I bought was the primer for around 12 UsDollar. So I might be overthinking this. It's not like I bought a pair of shoes for a 1000 bucks. But I must admit that I have been spending quite a lot of money lately, I ordered stationary for 100 UsDollars for instance. But I needed it! Bah, I should try to stop over-thinking things.
We had lunch at a salad-bar. Now that is HUGE for me. I don't eat out, I have real trouble eating in front of other people. I had an avocado-cottage cheese salad and it was yummy! I even let my boyfriend take a picture of me and the food and I uploaded it on Instagram. Big deal for me.
I skyped with my mum for an hour in the evening, messing around with my moustaches. Haha. I told her that we all think that she's addicted to the internet. And she actually agreed to that. She told me about some fucked-up things that my dad has done lately. She always has a packed bag now, so she can leave at once if necessary. From what she told me, it sounds like he has a drug-induced psychosis. That's what drugs do to you if you have taken them for like 30 years. She said that she won't leave the house until she has an own place to move into, until she knows where to get the money from to survive. That's her decision. I would have left already some weeks ago. My mum looked tired and exhausted. But she laughed hard at my moustache-stunts. It was good to see her.
I then chatted with a friend from åland which was fun. She's a great person and always have something to talk about. Then my boyfriend got a call, his father is dead. The thing is that they never really were in touch, he left his mum when he was only 2, his mum died when he was 3 and he then got adopted by his grandparents. His father only came to visit them when someone had died and he thought he could get some money from inheritence. My boyfriend sent him a letter about a year ago to know about any illnesses in the family but only got a short note back saying that his father doesn't want any contact with him. So yeah, it was more like a relief for him to get to know that his father is dead. Although he is a bit sad that he never really got to know him, never really met him.
And during the night the riots started again. I'm sure that most of you have read about the riots in Stockholm and especially in the suburbs. It's happening in my suburb too, they burned down cars, they smashed windows and threw stones at the police. Last night I saw a gang of maybe 30 youngsters walk into the center, carrying things they can fight with. It all seems a bit apocalyptic. We bought an extra-insurance for our car so in case it gets burned down, we get money. The thing that is annoying me the most are the helicopters flying around, all the damn time! I get that the police needs to have an overview of the area but those helicopters are loud! I have my strong opinions about the riots that I really don't need to share here. Let's just say it's the government's and the system's fault. If the gap between rich and poor grows, people get upset eventually.
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